2 years

slightly over two years have past since i last saw you, the memories remain clear in my mind.

we had just finished spm, waiting to celebrate our new found freedom..

I remember, we wanted to watch harry potter.. we waited for you, for you to return from sibu

but you never did

the days that followed were filled with grief

no words could describe it

no pictures from those days either

because the impression is everlasting

i held my composure throughout, or at least i tried

i remember sitting in your room with the gang, trying so hard to hold on when we knew it was impossible

i remember your living room where we had countless gatherings and parties

the same place where i gazed at your beautiful face..your face was calm, so was i.

because i knew that you were in a better place

i tried talking to you, hoping that you could hear..but you know me, i suck at letting my feelings loose. i kept on repeating myself..my mind was just overwhelmed by all that has just happened

you probably chuckled as you watched me from above..i was muttering and stumbling for words
like a guy on a first date

i stayed with vince the night before the service, my friend of so many years

we talked throughout the night, he was sobbing, i was reserved..we were very frank with each other..

morning came, we walked with you to the altar, proudly wearing our prefect blazers because we knew that it meant a lot to you

i couldnt hold it any longer but still i resisted

finally i gave in.i cried. my tears ran wild..

i tried to stop, but i couldnt

what's the point?...i let it run free. i never felt that much genuine grief before..vince was right. it felt good to cry





those were the happy days..the gang in its full glory



its been 2 years now since those days.This was how we ended our school years and this was how i began my new life studying in college.sometimes i just wonder to myself..why did it have to end like this? how would it be like if you were still with us?...in the end, ill just have to trust that God has plans for everything.

Just to let you know, were scattered all over the place now..rach's in the UK..avery's in kch, vince is in KL,jason's in the phillipines,naya, evan and gen are still home, nads, ivan,wayne and irene all studying in semenanjung..but it wouldnt really matter to you right?

because we all know you'll remain in our hearts wherever we may be...

as for me, that picture of red group during prefect camp 2004 follows me wherever i go..u'd know which one im talking about =)

to my dearest hannah;

i hope you're having a blast up there. Ill join you when my time comes..and when were all there, we can party just like the old times.



in loving memory of hannah lipang nawan